U hear me?

今晚有一点难受

2012-01-25T00:33:00.003+08:00

peaceful moments

2012-01-21T18:34:00.002+08:00

continue going stronger! :)

p/s: nic, the photo is for you. the little dress you bought. :)

The limitless sky

2012-01-21T18:07:00.004+08:00

There is so much of sky and green in Gemas.

it feels like a forgotten place

along with the kids that have been abandoned.

One day, my kids would know that there is a world out there

and they too, can venture out there and conquer them all.

One Day

2012-01-12T14:03:00.002+08:00

my students will be able to write and read

more than their own name

be it in any language.

i cant allow myself to give up

2012-01-12T13:43:00.008+08:00

the customer next to me in goreng pisang stall insisted

i should go first because i'm a teacher.

my girl told me shyly that i'm pretty.

i lost control and slammed on my student desk today.

my boy got whipped on his hand for not having his name tag.

all i see was that 5cm white flesh and his tears.

i was holding back mine.

he do not deserve that punishment.

this is not right.

Day 1

2012-01-12T13:42:00.000+08:00

In the culture of achievement pathway,
my classroom was destructive.

kiss me

2012-01-01T19:24:00.001+08:00

是不是只要湊過去
就能得到你的寵愛？

stop stalking. he "unfriend" you.

2011-12-28T01:50:00.003+08:00

it hurts being toyed.

it hurts that it is still the same password.

it hurts that he is doing things we are supposed to.

it hurts the way he remembered me.

it hurts how he flirted.

it hurts how those people arent good enough for him.

it hurts not seeing my name anymore.

谢谢你

2011-12-17T23:36:00.002+08:00

两个月前的今天，我失去了很多。

两个月后的今天，我得到了很多。

How to not love them?

2011-12-12T20:49:00.004+08:00

23% in diagnostic & 96% in assessment.

Every 1% of improvement makes me proud.

My kids wrote their brain out till the very last minute!

Warm & Fuzzy

2011-12-12T20:47:00.000+08:00

Kem SKORlah @ SMK Ampang Pecah

2011-12-12T14:05:00.002+08:00

My awesome Collabs. :)

我的思念很小心

2011-12-04T23:34:00.005+08:00

我会发着呆，然后忘记你。

那一天会有人代替，让我不再想念你。

爱淡了、梦远了，说好的幸福呢？

hide folder > click.

2011-12-04T23:17:00.010+08:00

wedding guest list

wedding gown

wedding dinner floor plan

house interior design

our future.

what i could have. what i've lost.

Teaching is Awesome

2011-12-03T13:37:00.006+08:00

i have been really busy. real busy.

We have been teaching in KemSKORlah for 3 weeks.

Summer school.

i feel so nervous before my class

kept jumping and pacing behind the classroom

getting myself psyched up

I was never a public speaking person,

*if you think i am, i pretend well.*

the moment i stand in front of my class,

self consciousness just goes away.

all i'm thinking is my students' learning.

such an adrenaline rush.

it feels so incredibly good after a good class.

and incredibly sucky too after a lousy class.

i feel alive. :)

the place. the people. teaching.

2011-11-21T21:40:00.005+08:00

this is actually really nice.

it put the messy thoughts in my brain to a rest.

the last

2011-11-11T22:21:00.008+08:00

world is ending in 2012 & i dont have a billion

lets get married and have kids now!

no! have kids after 2012!

easier to run and hide with just the two of us.

moments like this

2011-11-01T22:46:00.006+08:00

i've been rather detached since i went to MRSM at 15.

i feel the support & love at moments like this

how the only thing matters to her is my happiness.

nothing else.

like how it has always been.

Day 2 - the Gorilla

2011-11-01T22:24:00.006+08:00

Dossier spoke about how we often missed the obvious.

She dedicated herself to education so much

one day her young brother told her that she is a stranger.

at times i chase after things in life that doesn't really matter

and i lose them all

the people & the moments that matter.

p/s: i think this leadership video is awesome.

Day 1

2011-11-01T00:16:00.008+08:00

More mingling. endless mingling. argh.

Burmese refugees school visit

much more structured

i felt more at ease, just doodle & draw & talk with them.

instead of using a structured list of reflection tasks

or to teach in front of the classroom.

The official launching @ Courtyard Damansara Heights

i am still awkward with strangers - the fellows

nonetheless it feels great being with people who thinks alike, people who carries such energy that helps me to strengthen my own.

Day 1 and i am exhausted. I need more sleep.

Writing assignment. zzz

back to school back to school~

Day 0

2011-10-30T23:21:00.003+08:00

settling down. mingling. ice breaking. orientation.

mini personal goals

more muscles
no biting nails
read news everyday
confidence & outgoing

im starving.

2011-10-28T16:16:00.003+08:00

See just because i end it

doesnt make it any easier for me.

you can openly grieve about it while i cried silently

i am sad

2011-09-29T16:29:00.002+08:00

you probably do not understand.
neither do i.
but i am sad.

i don't like being left out like this.
i don't like being excluded from everything.
i don't like feeling as if i have evaporated into thin air
you see me but you didn't really see me.
you saw through me.

you should probably knew it by now

2011-09-16T11:25:00.005+08:00

if you are stalking me. ;p

the moment i walk out of that room

i can feel my every cells bouncing with joy

i dunno how the future will be

i dunno if i can do it

but i am taking it.

hello world~

2011-09-04T16:15:00.014+08:00

this is the puppy i was talking about in my previous post!

his name is ah-boy

a little dumb, not fully toilet trained yet

i will scream if i need to wipe his pee off the floor or pick up his poop on the sofa again.

and this is him scared of the vacumn cleaner and hiding by my side obediently oh so rare.

***

paintball!!!

that surge of violence without legal consequences.

***

i went to liggy's house during my Merdeka Raya holiday

thus the colorful photos in the paddy field

brushed my teeth using kodomo lion during the stay hehe!

***

i am obsessed with my fingers on the steering wheel

i grew those nails before i started work

and lose it all during my stressful months

i am growing it back!!!

oh, and i found my phone cable back. :)

in search of the self i want to be

2011-09-04T15:32:00.003+08:00

i don't like the 'me' now

i'm doing things that i'm not passionate about

and it shows.

i read back what i wrote before i started

not to lose myself

not to be blinded by money and greed

and look, where am i now?

every single day at work,

i am questioning myself,

what am i doing?

i used to be the assertive one, used to be.

now, i do things for the sake of doing it

kissing ass.

day by day, i told myself i need to quit.

day by day, i forego / delay the thought.

for today the boss was more bearable,

for pay day is coming,

for there is PH this month or next,

for bonus is coming,

for i want to fit in the norm.

this list has no ending unless i put a stop to it.

forever there will be another excuse.

i feel my fire weakening

i am getting swayed.

i am making a turn.

i am.

another update :)

2011-08-07T16:06:00.011+08:00

i cut my hair. hehe. =)

i wanted to wait till i snap a nice photo of myself n photoshop it first before posting it here.

but it took too long for a nice photo of myself and it grew longer already.

my deadline is over.

i feel like going crazy!

and now i have more time to think. :)

we've got a puppy now.

i wanted to post a photo of that dumb ass too

but i cant find my phone cable. geram.

I had marvelous food, beach & paddy field this Raya break.

Nic posted this photo on FB,

but i decided i want a colored version too. :)

Liggy's house has a window like this that turns into mirrors at night!

What more can i ask for?

yay

2011-07-24T17:59:00.004+08:00

my baby is tinted

& sai bak bak ady! =)

should i add a spoiler? hmm..

so proud

2011-07-19T21:30:00.001+08:00

i inflate the tire myself.
and i know how to pump petrol too.

*grinning*

chill dude

2011-07-14T23:12:00.005+08:00

i thought you went a little defensive
when we spoke about family background.

that's rather unnecessary to be honest
rather insulting too.

it is almost full moon tonight

2011-07-12T22:46:00.003+08:00

i am a princess
living in my Lalaland~

occupational hazard

2011-07-12T22:35:00.003+08:00

my shoulder used to be one of my favorite body parts
until i start accumulating muscle on the shoulder & back
from the daily sore & tense

i want the curves back =(

some updates

2011-07-12T00:37:00.009+08:00

i got a car!

ta-daa! cantik anot?!! ♥

then we pindah rumah to USJ11!

gary turning into ninja turtle!

shifting in with very health conscious cousins!

hmm...taste a little too healthy to be good.. =S

embrace my daily routine of jamm

and more jamm... *sigh i miss damansara*

this week has to be a better week! ♥

ahh so nice

2011-07-11T23:23:00.005+08:00

took nap on both satur & sun...
mmm...so contented *smiling ear to ear*

why the tolerance never build up?

go die

2011-07-05T18:02:00.004+08:00

people who have been working in a cubicle for a long time have no manners.
they just keep the tone low and thought that they were being polite.
no conscience. no self awareness.
assholes.

今晚很低落

2011-06-16T23:55:00.002+08:00

有时候实在不想说话。

因为说了也没人会懂。

想说也不知能向谁说。

the new colleague

2011-06-06T19:10:00.009+08:00

we had 2 new colleagues joining us last week
one of them made ba-zhang and gave to the seniors

correction: gave to one senior only

smart step to buy senior's heart

not so smart that everyone else knows.

our team is so small.

imagine the rumors that is going around now.

aiyoyo~

这样值得吗？

2011-06-04T13:24:00.004+08:00

最近工作总觉得委屈

为什么要被不用脑、没有意义的工作给埋没？

为什么要做到想哭、做到自己也觉得智商变低变笨？

还要看着个老男人耍心机？

为了钱，要让自己麻木在号码、荧幕和人事政治中？

i asked him

2011-05-21T10:49:00.003+08:00

if i'll always be childish
would he marry me?

I was expecting an instant "no"
as he always nag at me for never grow up

without hesitant, he nodded.

ahh, i feel so loved. ♥

all my life

2011-05-21T10:39:00.002+08:00

i struggled to prove myself
older than i actually am
that age is nothing
to the extend that i feel old now for my age.

out of the wednesday blue

2011-05-18T20:52:00.002+08:00

i jogged a little while after work before it rained. =)

then i thought of exercising at home,

so i googled up 潘若迪 - fitness trainer

coz he appeared so many times in 康熙来了.

OMG that fitness exercise for <10min

i dunno if my limbs still belongs to me.

love.

2011-05-17T03:39:00.004+08:00

when i was still playing with barbie,

my dream was to marry prince william.

as i grew older,

i have a more realistic dream.

and there he is.

Happy birthday!

spot it!

2011-05-11T22:14:00.000+08:00

i made a small move.

2011-05-09T19:20:00.002+08:00

regardless how it will turns out

or how i eventually decide

i am glad that i gave myself a choice.

i contemplate

2011-05-08T14:39:00.002+08:00

on how life should be.
money and comfortable living?
happiness and fulfillment?

i have no answer.

my life is sad ok

2011-04-28T19:49:00.002+08:00

i got home feeling hungry

search for food in fridge which i used to cook

i want hot food, hot meat ok!

took some sausage, crab meat, burger patty whatever

microwave it bite it

and it is already spoilt!

all of them!

Geram! still hungry!!!

Disclaimer

2011-04-19T19:23:00.003+08:00

I am not engaged / married yet ok.

cute guys out there, i'm still single & available.

err...well, not exactly available.

but still. you get my point?

what is this tiang???

2011-04-19T00:06:00.000+08:00

officially done!

2011-04-18T23:43:00.004+08:00

my beloved ms winnee OMG!

he went for health screening

2011-04-18T23:02:00.001+08:00

Increase weight by 3kg!!! Hooray!

Height reduced 5cm?!!

WTF?!

love~

2011-04-18T21:00:00.000+08:00

take it away okay

2011-04-18T19:37:00.005+08:00

the moment that bitchy hand land on your shoulder & neck

i'm fighting back the urge to pour my drink on it or break it.

that's my man that you're touching bitch~

hehehe...

2011-04-17T21:55:00.002+08:00

OMG i rarely blogged!

2011-04-16T13:51:00.001+08:00

work is sucking the life & brain out of me!

ex-auditor & now-accountant

2011-04-16T13:41:00.005+08:00

we left the condo key in the car,

go down walk back & get it.

HE: raining la. you wait here la.

ME: don't want, i want go with you.. *love*

HE: huh? then u go yourself la. i wait you here.

ME: huh?!?

HE: 1 go enough la. why need 2 people go under rain?

OMG need to be so calculative & energy efficient meh?

6pm

2011-03-03T22:05:00.005+08:00

stacks of work pilling up but i dont care.

at work, i work; off work, i don't.

Darren picked me up,

spontaneously we went to SS2 evening market

miss my pasar malam gang!

the room is all mine this evening

took a very long bath,

eating my taufu fa now.

life feels good at times. =)

有了厌倦烦躁

2011-02-25T22:27:00.005+08:00

I feel like you doesn't care about me as much already.

Sunday you come back i buy something, k?

Yes, i appreciate presents.

but since when my feelings can be healed with you buying things?

i super ♥ this photo!

2011-02-21T19:40:00.001+08:00

玄彬那男人

2011-02-15T22:18:00.006+08:00

i'm having the withdrawal effect of 'secret garden' now.

after every drama, i feel like 疯狂地恋爱/失恋。

All i read in Allkpop is now "hyun bin".

*besides jo kwon & gain*

Star!

2011-02-12T01:01:00.004+08:00

we went to watch 'I love Hong Kong' and guess what?

Eric Tsang 曾志伟 & 娥姐 appeared in the cinema!!

what a pleasant surprise!

We

2011-02-09T20:26:00.004+08:00

sometimes i would think

why are we so not happening,

ordinary T-shirts quiet by the corner of the lecture hall,

obediently jotting notes or dozing off.

why aren't we like them?

today i thought

this is simply us.

yes we may not be as rich and as bitchy

but we do enjoy the simplicity and ordinariness.

miss my friends.

the perks

2011-02-07T01:39:00.014+08:00

Company dinner @ Philea Resort & Spa

very nice room but not sound proof

ignoring mum's comment on my eye

won lucky draw - massage but haven't use =(

Hanoi & Halong Bay, Vietnam 26-30Jan 2011

too cold to enjoy the beach

people squatting while eating, run faster, so they say.

cut the cholesterol = smiley~

CNY was fun

2011-02-07T01:02:00.012+08:00

not so much for the angpaus

but gatherings with friends,

board games, poker cards & late night stays

more time with him~

attempted to cook dinner for him today

until i chop my finger with the knife.

even my finger nail also gone *cry*

showed him my bloody finger with tears

he treated the injury & cooked for me instead ♥

he is still working at his desk now

it feels good to be together.

i'm on leave tomorrow. yay!

GONG XI FA CAI!

I noticed that

2011-02-07T00:58:00.005+08:00

my belly shrinks while i pee.

我就是胸无大志， so?

2011-01-24T23:12:00.009+08:00

as inspired by KC's "Hopes & Dreams", must give credit bit.

i super like coz it says exactly what i've been trying to.

stop asking me all these nonsensical question

coz my answer ain't the norm / your expectation.

i wanna get married to a good man & be a good wife.

i wanna have kids & be a good mum.

i want money.

understand?

no? nevermind, just don't bother.

unless you wanna marry me of coz.

or wanna give me money.

ain't no listening to you

2011-01-17T22:40:00.003+08:00

i say, i just wanna get married & stay home,

stay away from all these nonsense.

he say, if i wanna get married, he wanna marry me.

for a seconds, i actually imagine how it would be like.

just stop fighting in this world.

need not bite my lip and suck in the shit you threw at me

act all goody girl nodding to you screaming nonsense

while my heart is screaming fuck you.

i wanna write a wishlist

2011-01-17T22:30:00.008+08:00

i actually talked to him & cried.

guess what he say?

welcome to the working world

reminds me of what a taxi driver told me

when i say im going for an interview

welcome to the world of lies

i didn't thought i would cry thou.

such immature little girl crying

as if i care if she was being shouted at.

everyone is an actor wearing permanent masks.

how not to get swayed?

sucks

2011-01-13T00:04:00.004+08:00

my life feels empty at times.

my job feels meaningless at times.

i got A screaming at me for what B has done.

i wanna record all your nonsense and just replay it to B.

sometimes i feel im adapting already

then i realized im conforming incredibly well.

i relate absolute nothing to psych, except life skills.

Dr.Goh never told us about politics.

i am more interested to be a homemaker than this.

i hate people who fly aeroplane at me.

again and again convincing me how insincere you are.

i wanna go back. so badly.

Driving 101

2011-01-05T20:12:00.008+08:00

Always pee before you drive
else when you stuck in the jamm...

i need a car sign that says:

beware~ manual car may slides backwards on slope.

stop kissing my ass.

one thing that i wish i have done

2010-12-06T19:59:00.001+08:00

i wish i were more adventurous

and went for W&T USA.

i shall have some time tomorow

2010-12-06T19:15:00.007+08:00

since it is a public holidays.

public holidays have never been this significant before this.

love my friends who made me my 21st birthday present,

TQ so so much!

so touched wanna cry!

***

M bought me choco from UK, wrapped.

i suka!

2010-11-29T21:27:00.002+08:00

why hurtful words seems to slip easily from your lips?

bye bye~

2010-11-21T14:57:00.001+08:00

Practice your rights as a Malaysian!

2010-11-21T14:54:00.003+08:00

Stop complaining about politics / government!

then continue to mumble & complain!

stock up!

2010-11-21T14:53:00.000+08:00

like an auntie!

Yes, lovers got no hands for themselves.

2010-11-14T15:56:00.011+08:00

so i cut his fingernails for him.

but today i was having fun.

he wasn't aware of these nails until he scratches himself!

OUCH! *laughing hysterically*

eat shit!

2010-11-14T15:53:00.001+08:00

is his latest '口头禅'.

after days of being asked to eat shit,

i found this bean sprout in my rice noodle.

fine! im eating shit now.

happy?

Stop asking me How's work?

2010-11-14T15:39:00.011+08:00

coz i dunno how to answer you except "OK".

Work is awesome for the $$$ and benefits.

Work sucks for the politics & kepohchis.

contact lens & make up

2010-11-14T15:35:00.003+08:00

takes up so much time in the morning.

i am seriously sleep deprived.

it is a struggle to wake up every single morning.

how can people not love weekends?

zzzz...

mum thinks i look ugly in contact lens

2010-11-14T15:30:00.007+08:00

well, she didn't exactly said that.

out of love and kindness to her own daughter, she said:

"err...ur eyes are too small, u...don't look good in lens"

What do u think?

ll u ever get used YY w/o specs?

or specs is seriously better?

2010-11-11T19:30:00.002+08:00

my feet is smelly.

but i kinda like the way it smells.

it was not superb

but it was not bad either

OK is not an answer?

then how should i say?

there is so many spies.

so many. everywhere.

ouch!

2010-11-02T19:11:00.004+08:00

He applied leave for my birthday.

on 18 November.

nvm still ♥ you!

2010-10-28T20:33:00.002+08:00

even if i do absolutely nothing at work,

having to be attentive continuously for 9 hours is tiring.

all my life

2010-10-16T18:15:00.008+08:00

i've only met one person who doesn't listen to music.

well, that's him.

lately, i found out that he does listen to music.

take me home, country road (1971)

as time goes by (casablanca; 1942)

are you 23? or you've been 23 for awhile?

A week more~

2010-10-10T20:48:00.007+08:00

What else do i want to do?

What cant i do anymore after this?

saying goodbye to being irresponsible and childish,

being an adult, capable & resourceful.

I will try remind to myself not to lose myself

happiness, love, family, friends...

not to be blinded by money and greed.

catching the tail of time

2010-10-08T22:40:00.006+08:00

too many chns posts recently.

should analyze if writing in certain language is induced by certain moods.

2010-10-07T02:47:00.001+08:00

I will disappear before tomorrow.

with a broken heart.

Gamblers - ARUPS research

2010-10-06T09:26:00.004+08:00

Addictive gamblers would only stop gambling

when their family abandoned them completely.

such hard fact to swallow.

easy to say but hard to do.

my heart literally aches

that i left before the Q&A session started.

面试

2010-10-05T21:52:00.003+08:00

穿着整幅武装，

信心满满仰着头挺着胸，

什么都不畏。

被刺被割还要很君子地说谢谢，

用风度微笑走出去。

回到家，懈下武装，把假的自信面具拿掉，

才发现伤痕累累，不堪一击。

FUTURE, where?

2010-10-04T15:43:00.010+08:00

with ARUPS ending,
my uni life is really coming to an end.

except HELP still owe me my security deposit!

mister!

2010-09-24T21:24:00.001+08:00

u everyday jog at night i ady think u siao,

tonight RAIN u still jog,

i really think u siao leh!

太多

2010-09-23T11:52:00.002+08:00

很多东西知道要做，知道不该再拖，

但就是不想开始、不敢开始。

怕挫折、怕拒绝，假洒脱。

拖着，心里却一直忐忑害怕着。

推我一把，好吗？

幸福的人呀~

2010-09-22T22:58:00.003+08:00

人参药材鸡汤

让你补一补~

came back to KL

2010-09-20T19:33:00.007+08:00

and found this!

guess what?

burger bun that i forgotten a month ago!

turn all green! one glimpse, i thought it is guava!

***

put on facial mask with dear yesterday!

so syok~

trouble getting asleep at night

2010-09-18T11:23:00.009+08:00

& not getting asleep at daytime lately.

last night, i had a series of nightmareS:

fights with family,
lil bro & I was robbed,
sneaked back to MRSM for a visit and was caught,

ladiladida~

woke up scared after first nightmare,
sms lil bro asking if he is alright,
sms friend to 'relieve scariness',
thinking who on earth would be awake to reply at 6am,
slept & woke again after second nightmare,
saw lil bro & friend sms replies,
thinking there is indeed people who is awake at 6am,
slept & woke again after third nightmare,
decided to give up sleeping. sigh~

realistically scary dreams!
Im yawning now! ugh!

drive & curse

2010-09-18T10:50:00.008+08:00

Mum once said,
choose a guy by how he drive.

Jk 'kena saman' 50cent
for each time he curse in the car in my presence.
No like W curse in the car too.

Luckily my dear never curse, not even once.

150910,
when the engine died multiple times in the same spot,
i actually cursed.

OMG.

不放

2010-09-13T00:52:00.001+08:00

最近心里都在挣扎。

还想抓着过往的尾巴。

改变，毕竟还是忐忑的。

遗憾？

2010-09-11T11:04:00.006+08:00

可能就黑斑纹症就死了。

躺在闷热拥挤的医院房，

才急着要找某些人，

想握住他的手，说出埋在心中的话，好让我没遗憾地去。

也不知这念头哪来的。

想想会想见谁，会说些什么。

以前不明白你的爱和伟大。

一辈子都要捍护你。

你对我太好了，谢谢你。

这辈子若没遇到你，我或许都在流泪。

你为这家默默挨过的苦

受过的委屈，我们懂。

你就是我心头的肉

要乖，疼你。

很可惜我当时不够成熟，

后悔枉费了你对我的真。

K
为了别人曾忽视你的关心，

用言语轻视伤害了你，对不起。

曾看见你默默离开的背影，

我没挽留，让你孤单了。

他的好

2010-09-11T11:02:00.005+08:00

就像是一整个配套。

填补我的疮疤和空洞。

是亲情和家的感觉。

2010-09-11T10:58:00.001+08:00

i still have withdrawal effect of the last gathering.
*cry*

U hear me?

今晚有一点难受

peaceful moments

The limitless sky

One Day

i cant allow myself to give up

Day 1

kiss me

stop stalking. he "unfriend" you.

谢谢你

How to not love them?

Warm & Fuzzy

Kem SKORlah @ SMK Ampang Pecah

我的思念很小心

hide folder > click.

Teaching is Awesome

the place. the people. teaching.

the last

moments like this

Day 2 - the Gorilla

Day 1

Day 0

i am sad

you should probably knew it by now

hello world~

in search of the self i want to be

another update :)

yay

so proud

chill dude

it is almost full moon tonight

occupational hazard

some updates

ahh so nice

go die

今晚很低落

the new colleague

这样值得吗？

i asked him

all my life

out of the wednesday blue

love.

spot it!

i made a small move.

i contemplate

my life is sad ok

Disclaimer

what is this tiang???

officially done!

he went for health screening

love~

take it away okay

hehehe...

OMG i rarely blogged!

ex-auditor & now-accountant

6pm

有了厌倦烦躁

i super ♥ this photo!

玄彬 那男人

Star!

We

the perks

CNY was fun

I noticed that

我就是胸无大志， so?

ain't no listening to you

i wanna write a wishlist

sucks

Driving 101

one thing that i wish i have done

i shall have some time tomorow

bye bye~

Practice your rights as a Malaysian!

stock up!

Yes, lovers got no hands for themselves.

eat shit!

Stop asking me How's work?

contact lens & make up

mum thinks i look ugly in contact lens

ouch!

玄彬那男人